Sweet
by HPFreakswillrule
Summary: Love, Death Chocolate


Sugar high 

Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki … Waugh (runs off crying)

When I fell in love, it was over chocolate. At least, I think it was. Don't they say that eating too much chocolate can emulate that feeling? Sanzo had offered me some one day, and without thinking, I had accepted and with just that one square of milky sweetness I was smitten.

We met in secret for weeks after that, talking and kissing. He always tasted like chocolate and I suspected that he had slipped a square into his mouth moments before each kiss on purpose, because he knew that was my weakness. And it was, because if it hadn't been for chocolate, I would never have found myself so enamored.

The weeks turned into months and those months I saw myself torn apart. He went off to fight against Gyumahoh and I stayed where I was to defend my village. The battle was short and there was no victory party for me as my brothers fell and I watched the man I'd shared chocolate with walk away.

Surprisingly, I was never charged for my mercy killings during the war and I took that as a sign that I should move on. So I traveled. Anywhere I wanted to go, I went. La-Nunn first, then Grumanra, Beel and Icarly. I saw such wonderful things and met such wonderful people. I dined in the finest restaurants and ate the finest food. And chocolate, I always ate chocolate, because I knew that chocolate could make me happy.

So I ate it whenever I traveled and I bought it wherever it was sold because it reminded me of something I had discovered ever so long ago, in an empty classroom with the boy who had offered me a piece of his candy for reasons I still couldn't fathom.

The days turned to months turned into years and one day, as I was making my way back to your four story house in Shangri-la, I bumped into someone I recognized all too well.

I didn't know what to say at first so I invited him in for a drink and tried to make conversation. It had been so long since I'd seen him and so long since I'd spoken that words did not come easily and I found myself almost wishing him gone until I sat down and he held out his hand.

"Have some chocolate, Salix." he said, and I smiled and I ate and I learned and I loved. Because even after all this time apart, even after years of separation, in the end, we knew, it would always come back down to chocolate.

Bitter

When he sees a youki now, when he senses its presence, he can no longer hear the cries of his comrades. His friends died a long time ago, almost to long ago to remember.

It's the muffled whimpering, like an itch in the back of his throat that can't seem to be pinpointed that enters his mind whenever he sees a youki on the battlefield. It's been a year or so now since she was able tell the difference between Gojyo's and Goku's last breath.

_It is our choices…_

And when he crawls into bed at night, despair teetering on the edge of slow insanity, it's the lingering memories of his deceased friends and lover who turns to him and forces chocolate down his throat. Telling him that everything will be okay tomorrow when he knows that it won't, because there's a battlefield waiting outside, ready to kill or get killed on. No one ever said the world wasn't dog eat dog.

_what we truly are…_

"Here, have some chocolate", Salix used to say. Have some chocolate and it'll take all the pain away. It feels like a hundred years ago now. Sanzo's the type who doesn't like to live in the past, but can't help in getting caught up in it sometimes.

_far more than our abilities_

But chocolate only tastes bitter to him now. Like blood. Pure, half, mud: it's all bitter, and one day, it'll be the death of him.

fin

Just cause I can

Snarling over breakfast, the children heard Sanzo's harsh words to Yaone as they left for the day… school was a welcome distraction. The bickering began properly in the afternoon, turning to shouting at dinner. Soon after it became screaming, the sounds of things breaking and doors slamming echoing in the empty rooms upstairs.

"Wouldn't it be good if he finished each himself off?" Roshi was too young to know what the words meant, he just wanted them to stop, for the house to be quiet for once. Mizu hugged him tighter and eventually they drifted into a restless sleep, huddled in the back of the closet. Both knowing chocolate can not fix their Fathers depression any more.

A/N: Yeah… here is an out line

1. Sanzo and Salix fall in love.

2. Marriage and kids.

3. New war…

4. Salix is murdered.

5. War ends and Yaone helps Sanzo with kids 'cause I said so.


End file.
